UMAX CORPORATION TO INCLUDE BIMBOS IN PACKAGING
CEO Makes Announcement After Wildly Successful COMDEX Show

Las Vegas, NV /DenounceNewswire/ 22 November 1996 -- Today at the COMDEX trade show Umax Corporation, makers of scanner and other imaging products, announced that effective immediately, it will ship one bimbo to each new customer who buys a UMAX scanner.

"We've been overwhelmed with the success of our dancing bimbos at this show," said Hugh Macks, president and CEO of UMAX. "We've had to bring in police to hold back the throngs of people who've crowded around our booth to see our bimbos," he added, said, and continued, saying and adding, "so it's a no-brainer that there's a demand for bimbos in our market."

Beginning tomorrow, one live, scantily-clad bimbo will be bundled in with each UMAX scanner product sold.

In related news, Comdex officials today said they had to temporarily clear the area for about 10 minutes in order to pick up the numerous jaws that had fallen off attendee's faces. In total, Las Vegas hospitals reported more than 12,000 emergency-room cases of dropjaw, up 4.5% from last year.

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